THE BILL OF SUGGESTIONS

1. We the People timidly suggest that the freedom of speech shall not be infringed. But we are willing to submit to “free speech zones” or to just shut up if there’s a risk of offending someone, especially if that person is religious. We also timidly suggest that we have the freedom to hold any religious belief we want to as long as it doesn’t conflict with that of the dominant religious sect.
2. We the People timidly suggest that we have the right to bear arms, but we promise only to use them on black or brown people…or hippies, freaks, gays and other “radicals.”
3. We the People timidly suggest that Corporate Feudal State forces cannot station themselves in the people’s homes…unless they really want to.
4. We the People timidly suggest that arrests, searches and seizures shall not be conducted by Corporate Feudal State agencies without evidence and authority from the people…unless they really want to. We the People trust you.
5. We the People timidly suggest that persons can only be found guilty of a crime when evidence is presented to a jury of one’s peers…or if the person has been tortured into confession…or if the Corporate Feudal State wishes to avoid the inconvenience of “due” process.
6. We the People timidly suggest that “due” process should be conducted swiftly and fairly unless, of course, the Corporate Feudal State doesn’t want to.
7. We the People timidly suggest that a trial by jury is in order in civil cases unless the case in question involves an employer, banking institution or multinational conglomerate.
8. We the People timidly suggest that fines, bails and punishments should be proportionate to the crime…unless, of course, the Corporate Feudal State feels otherwise.
9. We the People timidly suggest that there may be other suggestions we would like to make at some future time because we forgot to include them here. But we readily acknowledge that these are merely suggestions subject to the momentary whim of the Corporate Feudal State.
10. We the People timidly suggest that our state and local Corporate Feudal States cannot violate the suggestions listed herein unless they really want to.