Saturday, January 14, 2006

Unclear on the Concept

Like True Democrats, True Christians spend most of their time struggling with the morons within their own ranks. Here is a good example, courtesy of Blue Gal. Doesn't the Bible say something about bearing false witness? I think it does. I think it also warns against false prophets who seek to "deceive the very elect." Or something like that.

The first syllable of 'Christian' is 'Christ.' Christ is Jesus, right? So, if one wants to be a Christian, all one needs to do is follow Jesus' advice, yes? Let's see...What did Jesus say about fags? Nothing. Well, what did he say about abortion? Zip. Well, what about premarital sex? Nada. Well, what the hell DID he say? He said this:

“You shall love your neighbor as yourself.”

And this:

“He who rules his spirit has won a greater victory than the taking of a city.”

And this:

“Let he among you who is without sin cast the first stone.”

And this:

"And when thou prayest, thou shalt not be as the hypocrites are, for they love to pray standing in the synagogues and in the corners of the streets, that they may be seen of men."

And this:

"Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called the sons (and daughters) of God."

And this:

"For I was hungry and you gave me food; I was thirsty and you gave me drink; I was a stranger and you welcomed me; I was naked and you clothed me; I was sick and you visited me; I was in prison and you came to me..."

And this:

"Love one another."

How can so many so-called Christians embrace an ideology that is obviously diametrically opposed to the wishes of their religion's namesake? Oh, the irony!


Zeke said...

Hey, didn't God create homosexuals? I mean, he created everything, right?

I wonder what Christians think when they fuck. Is it, "Gee, I like this procreating", or, "Hey, got to be a devil SOME time". Inquiring minds would like to know.

Blue Gal said...

Thanks for the linky. As a believing Christian, I agree that the biggest problem we have is all the church garbage we've pasted on top of the teachings of Jesus. If you read the Sermon on the Mount, there isn't much to disagree with there: Love God, Love your neighbor, if you have to pray, do it in secret.

And Zeke, scientific studies have shown that at least for women, the brain completely shuts down during orgasm. So make sure she enjoys herself if you don't want her to think. xoxoxo

Big Daddy Malcontent said...

Christian women have orgasms?

Pissedoffcabbie said...

Women don't think when having orgasms, and also don't think when trying to parallel-park.

Blue Gal said...

Thank God. No irony intended.